Her Majesty’s Servants by Rudyard Kipling. Short summary

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One day the narrator managed to overhear what the animals were talking about at a military camp. The animals were talking about the war, discussing the battles they were involved in. Only one thing the animals didn’t understand: why they had to fight.

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The Viceroy of India was hosting the Emir of Afghanistan, for which a large camp was set up with more than thirty thousand people and many animals. One rainy night the narrator’s tent was broken down by a rampaging camel. He had to sleep under a cannon. There were several animals very close by. The narrator, who understood a little bit of animal language, overheard what the mule, camel, horse, ox and elephant were saying.

It turned out that the animals were talking about the same things that people were talking about. The horses scolded the camels, who made a commotion in the camp. Each was proud of his battery, bragging about his regiment, the horses boasting of their noble origins and laughing at the ignorance of the mules. All the animals for some reason spoke derisively of the camels. There was much speculation about the battles in which they had been involved. The narrator learned that mules were not afraid of natives, but were ready to run at the sight of a white man. The only thing that animals can’t understand when they go to fight together with a man unconditionally is for whom and for what they are fighting.